Waking Up Happy--What's With That?

Today I woke up happy. My laptop is positioned in the dining room on our 3 foot by 3 foot dining room table and I was looking forward to coming down here to write. Odd thing was I really didn't have something in mind to write about.

I have to go to the doctor for some fasting blood work today so maybe skipping my coffee is throwing me off. But I don't think so.

My son always woke up happy---always.

My son has a baseball game at 11 in a park I have never been to and normally that should be sending waves of panic running through my veins in the thought of trying to find the park and getting lost (like last night when the GPS led me to a sign for the park but no entrance!!!)

But today it doesn't.

I know the lawn needs to be mowed, my stepson didn't anything for his dad and neither did I yet and Father's Day is tomorrow---again--there would normally some panic.

But today there isn't.

The sky is blue, the sun is up and instead, today feels like a day of things that will happen--all in time---in the day---with more baseball tomorrow. And all will be as it should be.

Unusual feeling for me.

But I'll take it.

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Shame is A Full-Contact Emotion (Brené Brown)

It is a cool outside this morning and I have on my fluffy red robe as I sit outside and watch the birds flit back and forth from the fence to the feeder----arrogantly tossing aside imperfect sunflower seeds to get to the good ones. The discarded seeds, some empty, some full, punctuate my deck, waiting for the squirrels, who will later claim this easy buffet. I am still reading Brené and The Gifts of Imperfection. Feels a bit like learning a new language ---I see the words---I hear the words---but the meaning is so diffuse...I need to read and reread and sometimes, even read out loud to make the words stick It is hard work. And while the smooth cover of her book lies balanced on my palm, seemingly weightless, many of the concepts have a density that knocks me flat on my ass ---like a large medicine ball. CATCH THIS ONE! Oooooooof! I am down. Eyes wide, trying to catch my breath, wrestling with the weight of hefty concept...

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